WRITER'S BLOCK: HONESTY IS SUCH A LONELY WORD

December 20th, 2009

WRITER'S BLOCK: HONESTY IS SUCH A LONELY WORD

music: They Might Be Giants - Certain People I Could Name | Powered by Last.fm

personified

Honesty is such a lonely word

Do you think honesty is really the best policy when it comes to relationships? Is total honesty possible, let alone desirable?

REPLY289

YES. If you're in a relationship, you shouldn't be lying or hiding things from your partner. A strongrelationship is one in which you can be comfortable with being completely open with each other, even if what you're open about isn't exactly good news.

But unfortunately, I've learned the hard way that being open and honest kinda repels people from you. So... maybe you should actually be in a relationship before you're completely open. And by that I don't mean lie to people, but... don't blurt out how much you love crossdressing or how small your penis is unless it's absolutely necessary and until the person you're telling is already really close to you.

Tags: writer's block

Memories~

So, I'm reading over my 200+ logs I saved from my conversations with Anna, and I've gotta say... I was pretty annoying back then. Like, in late 2006/early 2007 I was constantly reminding her that she was supposed to call me. (Eventually she finally did. Twice.) And it seems like most of our conversations have at least one instance of me asking her to marry me or play PS2 nekkid while I watch and jack off to it or whatever, and her just saying "maybe", all mundane-like. She probably thought I was annoying, too, but just didn't want to say it.

Then I began wondering. How long did this go on? Was I still like this in August of 2008, when she blocked me? Could this have been the reason?

Of course, I've changed now, but I assume that she still thinks I'm like that. But damn, how can I prove I've changed after being annoying for so long?

Phil comments on Anna's LJ!

Okay, so yeah, it was me. I completely forgot that account existed until I read the log of when we started doing it. I was gonna do another comment being like, "Is it Nick? Or am I really your cartoon crush, giving you sound advice? OooOoooOOOooo!" but apparently she blocked all the BS accounts. So yeah.

But seriously, Anna, Phil speaks the truth. I love you. Why won't you at least give me a chance? And I mean damn, the fact that we worked on that project together should give you a hint. We used to be such good friends... always doing fun little projects like that together. What happened to those days, huh?

As a side note, does Anna actually read this blog? Because she probably should. I need a way to communicate things to her.

Ed Note: Pic is no longer there.

WRITER'S BLOCK: PASSWORD PROTECTED

December 16th, 2009

WRITER'S BLOCK: PASSWORD PROTECTED

music: They Might Be Giants - Birdhouse in Your Soul | Powered by Last.fm

bacon_fiend

Password protected

If your best friend and/or romantic partner read all of your email for the last month (or longer), how would it impact your relationship(s) and why?

REPLY341

It wouldn't matter in the least. Most of my emails are either automated things from Twitter, Facebook, etc. alerting me when things happen or chat logs I sent to myself for archival purposes.

In the rare event I do exchange personal emails with an actual person, it's never anything secretive. I don't keep secrets. I prefer to get everything out in the open before I meet new friends because if I do it after, they may decide they don't like me anymore.

Tags: writer's block

I'M SICK. :(

music: The Beatles - Sea of Time | Powered by Last.fm

Somehow I managed to catch a cold while here at my dad's, which is weird because nobody else here had one. But yeah, it's pretty terrible. It's making my usual post-nasal drip a ton worse, so much so that I keep vomiting due to all the mucus draining into my stomach. So, I looked up post-nasal drip on Wikipedia and I think I may have finally found my answer after four or five years of searching: nasal irrigation.

I haven't really tried it yet, but I probably will when I go home. I emailed my mom, who emailed my aunt (who's a nurse), who told me to try nasal sprays. So I dunno, maybe they'll get me some of those to try. We'll see. By the time I go home my cold'll probably be gone, but hopefully it'll help with my usual post-nasal drip.

Also, I learned from Dad that he has the same problem (mucus going down his throat and causing him to vomit), so it's probably hereditary. GEE, THANKS DAD. Oh, and he also told me I was illegitimate. Woo!

Feelin' optimistic.

Although I usually fluctuate back-and-forth between optimism ("Dude, I can feel it! Anna'll love me!") and pessimism ("Crap, what if I don't marry her? WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO HER?! OH GOD!"), recently I've been feeling pretty optimistic, like, constantly. I just woke up like that one day. I think maybe I had another one of my psychic dreams in which I'm hanging out with her IRL, but I can't remember.

Anyway, it only got reinforced even more when I had a heartwarming conversation with one of my friends yesterday. This is new because generally my conversations aren't heartwarming. In fact, they're usually heart... uh... coldening... with like, everyone insulting me and stuff. My self-esteem was boosted a bit by it.

And as if I weren't already in an uncharacteristically good mood after that, I was IMed by Kate. You might recall the incident two posts back in which she was involved. But to my great surprise, the conversation turned out to be quite civil. I mean, she did state that she hated me and wanted to castrate me, but other than that it was actually p cool.

So yeah, I'm actually in somewhat of a good mood now. Obviously I can't say I'm happy or even content quite yet, because uh Anna still doesn't love me, but at the moment I'm not as depressed as usual. I guess it's kind of a neutral mood... more leaned toward good than bad though. I dunno, I'm an Aspie. I don't know crap aboot feelings.

HONESTLY, I CAN NEVER THINK UP ENTRY TITLES

So here's the summary of the past fortnight I spent offline.

First thing that happened as soon as I came home was Mom yelling at me for saying I hated her on Facebook. She kicked me out of the house for a few days, until I eventually decided to fake-apologize so I could get back in and hang out with AO and my cats.

We also got a visit from this woman who, when I was a child, took me out for ice cream, took me to the playground, baked cookies with me, etc. I gave her a (very) brief summary of what's been going on in my sucky life and then we helped AO make a gingerbread house. Here is the result:



We also got two books of McDonald's coupons that expire December 31st. I've been trying to use them all before then, usually by buying lots of Angus burgers and coffees every day. I'm not sure I'll make the deadline, as I haven't even made a dent and I have to take a fortnight's break while I'm at Dad's house.

That's the gist of it. But just for kicks, I'll disclose my current obsessions. Digimon World 2 (although it's fading now), and The Venture Bros. I might see if I can get back into Clone High soon, too.

Ed Note: Pic is gone and I can't find it online.

Operation McFly

So. During my two-week absence from the Internet, I devised a new plan. You see, I bought two large coffees (a latté and a mocha, to be exact) from McDonald's, and upon drinking them, I realized I had traveled one minute back in time.

So I did some math. Assuming one coffee takes me back in time 30 seconds, I would have to drink 13,665,600 coffees to go back in time 13 years. Why would I want to go back 13 years, you ask? The answer is simple. 13 years ago, Anna was 2 (almost 3). This is the approximate time she moved to California.

Once I drink these coffees, I will become a 5-year-old again but will retain all my memories from being 18. Then, I will utilize said memories to do things that would be supernatural for a five-year-old to do, such as predict events and excel in school. 

Everyone will think I'm a prophet or something, and I'll use this to command my family to move to California. Preferably right next door to Anna. Then, Anna and I will be able to grow up together IRL. And by hanging out with me IRL, she'll actually get to know me unlike how the past five years of Internet-only friendship went down. Then she'll realize I'm not a stalker and will fall in love with me.

Now, the problem is... how will I afford that many coffees? They're $3.19 a piece IIRC, so that's a grand total of $43,593,264, not even counting tax. Hmm. :s

EDIT: Nevermind. I'm really, really dumb.