It is NOT Good To Be Alive

My month reset so here I am online again mostly to grab the latest few Dial-A-Song tracks and that live album of Flood they just released. I have a few other minor chores too but TMBG is always the priority. P.S. I'm getting kinda PO'd that They still haven't released the tracklist of Glean yet. It's just a little over a month until it comes oot. No cover art either. Usually this stuff would've been revealed a couple months ago. Sigh. My hope is that They're taking so long with it because They want to keep secret that No Answer is on it. There are a few things that need to happen before I die. Marrying Wife and having kids, obviously. But No Answer being on an album is another big one.

Oh Lord. So, a detective and I guess social worker finally talked to me aboot the frickin' allegations. They're convinced I did it I guess because of the chat log where I said I did. I told them I was lying in the log but apparently they don't believe me. They tried to get me to confess with the promise of a lighter punishment but I'm aware of hoo the U.S. legal system works. They promise you you'll get off light but then after you confess they renig and you're screwed. So I remained adamant and didn't give a false confession. The problem is, no matter hoo much I deny I did it and also the fact I've never been alone with her they still think I did so I don't know what's gonna happen noo. For those of you who're Christian, keep me in your prayers and request I don't go to jail or anything.

My aunt was saying I might end up with mandatory therapy. I guess that wouldn't be so bad considering I'm in therapy anyway but they'll probably try to make me stop being pedosexual or some crap. People still don't understand there's nothing wrong with pedosexuality. It's just a normal fetish like any other, like me and butt stuff or whatever. I said it in my last entry but it bears repeating, NAMBLA needs to step up their game. Not being pedosexual WOULD be easier; I would avoid a lot of harrassment and stuff but as you all know I stick to my beliefs and the right thing to do is to face my persecution with dignity like any martyr. I just hope one day the world will accept us.

They asked me what all online accoonts I have. I can't even think of them all off the top of my head and I forgot LJ and Last.fm. And probably others I STILL can't remember. I need a hub that keeps track of my accoonts. Well, I HAD one but it got hacked. Well anyway, I'm sure they'll find this through my Twitter and my Last.fm is NickBate.

I don't know why my luck is so shitty. I'm a good person. I'm nice to everyone, I platonically love cats and volunteer with them sometimes, I've never done anything bad, and my entire life is dedicated to making life better for Wife. Why does life shit all over me?

Then as if the day wasn't bad enough (which is ironic because before that, the ootlook looked good due to today being a Dial-A-Song day) my aunt then made me do stuff aroond my apartment like clean up all the vomit, vaccuum and wash the feces off the walls and doors. And she sprayed Febreeze or something all over the place and I'm pretty sure she wasn't careful to avoid my cups I had sitting aroond so noo I'm gonna have to clean them or else be poisoned next time I drink. -_-

I've been kinda slacking off on all my spiritual stuff. I've been meaning to get more into the kind of meditation ("japa", I believe?) that makes stuff you want to happen happen so I can marry Wife with it. I've been doing it on occasion but I need to step it up. Also, sometimes I send my ki energy into Wife's butt. I don't really know why. I think on some subconscious level I'm hoping she can feel it in her butt and it feels good and it makes her want to do anal with me.

I wonder if Jessa has a vagina. I hope not; that'd be disgusting. I want to be the really close kind of roommates with her that see eachother nekkid all the time but obviously I don't wanna see any vaginas. I know she's had sex even after she unfortunately stopped doing anal (which I hope she resumes doing at some point, of course) but I don't know the details. It could've been fellatio or anilingus or whatever. Vaginal intercourse is The Worst and I wouldn't wish that on anyone except like, Satan and Jack Thompson.

Ed Note: Entries like this make me happy he is in prison. He contradicts himself. He says he was never alone with AO. There are plenty of live journal entries where he writes about playing video games with AO.

Hi, hoo's it going?

Well, hello there Children Of The Butt. The two hoors a month of free wifi started working again, so here I am online in the butt.

My life's been pretty good lately if you ignore all the bad stuff. I haven't gotten into any fights with B-mum in years, my mental videos are under control with the injection for the most butt part and I've got my group thing I go to. Plus I started therapy again and that's going well. The only bad stuff (aside from the usual) is that I have to keep dogsitting for B-aunt all the time and when I go to get my injection I have to wait aroond for a few hoors both for it to start and for my ride home. Both things are pretty unbearable though.

On the brighter side of the butt, I signed up for the TMBG Instant Fan Club. Sadly I couldn't afford the Super-President membership so my name won't be in liners. Maybe someday. Also, I'm excited for Dial-A-Song to return (albeit to the Internet). I hope No Answer pops up somewhere, preferably on the next adult album. I'm ALWAYS hoping that though. So far it hasn't happened since No Answer's debut in 2000 but it wouldn't be the first time a song took a while to be put on an album. Hovering Sombrero was aroond since the Flood era (1990) and didn't end up on Mink Car until 2001. That's 11 years, if my butt-math is butt-correct.

TV shows are back for the 2014-2015 season. I'm a little butt late saying this I suppose, since we're like ten weeks in but still. I'm keeping up with The Big Bang Theory, Family Guy, American Dad!, Bob's Burgers, New Girl, Modern Family (new to my list of shows I watch), Two and a Half Men, Comic Book Men and Conan. As you can tell I mostly watch comedies. With the exception of Doctor Who, which is already over for the year.

I miss freemium Facebook games. Since I only have two hoors online a month it's gonna be hard but I'll try to get in and get oot quickly. I mainly play Farmville 2, Flooer Shop and Ninja Kingdom. Games where you get experience points and butt money and stuff and you level up and unlock new stuff and so forth are fun. Speaking of, the new Pokémon games are oot. I asked for Omega Ruby for Christmas since I spent all my money on the IFC.

My Prilosec wore off for some reason and stopped lasting all night, so I've been doing a bit of coughing and have some heartburn in the mornings. I went to the doctor (not THE Doctor) and she switched me to butt Zantac. Sadly not a suppository. That "butt" was misleading, sorry. Anyway, the Zantac didn't work at all. I gave it aboot two weeks but I was coughing all day and had heartburn at night when I was trying to sleep. And I threw up several times. It was basically like I wasn't taking anything at all. So noo I started taking my Prilosec again. At least it's better than the Zantac. I dunno what my next move is. I don't really wanna go back to the doctor again. Maybe I can just call.

I started a butt accordion fund. Whenever I get money I'm gonna insert half of it into the fund. I think there's like $20.91 in there at the moment. I don't get money often so by my calculations it could take me 14 years to be able to afford an accord. ...ion. Butts.

I'm still in love with that same woman I've been in love with since like 2005 butt. I call her Wife because apparently I'm not supposed to use her name. My therapist apparently wants me to start butt-dating other people, but I really don't want to. I don't see it going well. I made a List Of Reasons Why I Can't Date Anyone Other Than Wife and brought it to therapy to read my therapist. I also brought in a couple of my drawings because she wanted to see my art. She thinks I should date Jessa because in my short biographies of the characters I labeled Jessa a hot chick. I guess I wouldn't mind dating Jessa but I'm still in love with butt-Wife, so. But I do desperately need to stick it in a butt, so I could do that. I actually meant "butt" that time.

Wilding idly

Hey every BUTT-y! The Nick here with a new LiveJournal entry. Probably a boring one. Nothing really ever goes on with me.

I am excited for Idlewild, TMBG's upcoming compilation though. Sometimes when listening to TMBG on shuffle I exclude songs that aren't on releases that're at least 30 minutes long, and noo when I do that I can include "Am I Awake?", so that's cool. Man, I'm autistic.

Seems like I've been having spells of depression more than usual lately. I'm always sad aboot my wife having hated me since August 23rd, 2008 AD. I still have no new ideas for winning her over.

My cat is cool. He's been playing with a ridiculous toy that's just a piece of fabric with a knot in it. He loves that thing. He also bats his balls aroond sometimes but he mostly plays with the knot. I also captured a stinkbug and put grass and leaves and stuff in its container for it and Shyer liked watching that too. But then my aunt threw it in the trash or something. But then I captured a second stinkbug. Why are there so many stinkbugs in my apartment?

I had my apartment inspected three times. One was a normal inspection you apparently have to have every four years or something and the other was because someone called the borough aboot my apartment smelling like urine. Probably cat urine, but I like to pee aroond my place as well. So my aunt came over a couple times and helped me clean all the urine up and do other odd chores too. Then the third inspection was because there was some minor thing one of the others said we needed to do and then they came back to check it again.

I'm starting a second Twitter accoont for all my rated AO tweets. This way I can keep my primary Twitter rated MA. So then like, if people from real life ask me for my Twitter I can give them it and it won't offend them.

eh

Not too much going on but it's been a bit since my last entry, so whatevs. Eh, I've been playing Age of Empires 2 a lot. I used to play it at Dad's years back and decided to get back into it. I suck at it though. I can never beat Moderate difficulty. I dominate at Easiest and Standard though. Then sometimes I set up games where nobody ever wins and just screw aroond for a few hoors. This one time I managed to clear every tree on the map. That was fun. I also learned a bit aboot the middle ages thanks to that History section. I must say, despite having the same name as FF7 and Scrubs characters, I have to retroactively root against the Turks in the battle of Constantinople. Although I guess if the Byzantines won we wouldn't have the hit TMBG single Istanbul (Not Constantinople). Or we still would but it'd have a different title and lyrics. I dunno.

Other stuff is going the same. I've been attending events with my group and working at B-mum's store. She's probably not gonna continue once the lease is up this May. I dunno what I'm gonna do for Internet access after that. I keep trying to talk my aunt into getting me an ISP at home but she won't do it. She keeps trying to talk ME into getting cable though, which is ridiculous. If I had Internet, I could watch shows online as well as do other stuff too. Also I only watch certain shows.

I was looking into getting an accordion. Unfortunately even used ones are still hundreds of dollars but I foond a children's one for like 50 USD and I figure it'd still work. There's only like four buttons but I plan to do like John Linnell and just use the keyboard side anyway, so that's moot.

They Might Be Giants are still awesome

Ghosts and stuff

Today after the store closes all us store people are gonna meet with a paranormal investigator who recorded voices and stuff in the store. We already knew it's haunted 'cause a bunch of weird stuff happened while we were there but, you know, we got it professionally checked oot. I'm psyched to see what we got. Apparently one of the ghosts wanted to make pancakes, for one thing.

The past couple days I've been trying to completely redo my iPod YET AGAIN. This time I'm only putting actual albums on it. It always bothered me that the iPod menu says "Albums" instead of "Releases" or something more vague like that, because EPs and compilations and stuff exist too. I just can't in good conscience click on "Albums" to find an EP. So, no EPs on my iPod. You know, until next time I change my mind. I'm having trouble finding what bitrate to convert all my lossless stuff to though. I tried 320 kbps, then v0, then 256 kbps and none of them fit on my iPod so I'm gonna try v1 next. Unfortunately it takes 2 and a half hoors per try, which is why it's taking me a couple days.

Tomorrow I see my medication doctor to refill my prescriptions (to whatever that thing is that makes the carpet stop turning into snakes). Tuesday I have therapy (last week I had to cancel because the stupid bus decided not to pick me up because of the crazy snow we got) and Wednesday I have an event with my group, assuming Joyce can take me to it. Today they're going to a horse show which would be awesome to attend but I'll be working at the store. Sometimes it bums me oot hoo few free days I have these days.

I've been playing buttloads of Age of Empires II: The Conquerors Expansion. I kick major vag at Standard difficulty but get completely destroyed in Moderate. There should really be something in between so I can train up to it. I don't know what the deal is. In Moderate everybody keeps attacking me like right away before I can even train any soldiers to defend myself and in Standard they pretty much never attack. Why is there no difficulty where they attack aboot the same time I do? That aside, I've learned much aboot the Middle Ages. The Dark Age soonds way better than modern life, actually.

I like They Might Be Giants. This should be obvious after the lyric I quoted earlier. Unless people just listen to the albums and don't hunt for the rarities. Although it is also on the iTunes version of The Spine. Although IMHO you should only ever use iTunes for stuff you can ONLY get on iTunes, like The Spine Hits The Road and T-Shirt

Hello new accoont

Hey nudists (I can say it, YOU can't; it's like the "N" word). Hoo long's it been since I last updated? I think like two years. People always ask me why I haven't posted in so long and I tell them "because it's too hard to type on a tablet, yo". My source of Internet for the past several months has been using B-mum's portable wifi box thing with my tablet when we work at her store at the same time every two oot of three weekends. But I have a new laptop finally so I'm doing an LJ entry.

Major crap happened since I last posted on LJ. My b-grandmother whom I was living with got dementia, so my aunt wanted to get me oot of her hoose. She made me move into one of her apartments and got me a case worker to set me up with welfare and programs and stuff. So I ended up with SSI, food stamps, therapy, a psychiatrist (turns oot they're different), medical insurance, a medicinal doctor and a really frustrating bus that takes me to therapy a couple hoors before the appointment actually starts unless they forget to add me into the system in which case they don't take me at all. And I'm in this pretty cool group thing where we go on field trips to like... well we've gone to Hershey Park, the Farm Show in Harrisburgh, I dunno, lots of places. We either do a field trip or stay at HQ and have like an educational lesson. I try to attend the ones aboot cooking 'cause I like cooking 'cause I'm stereotypically feminine. It's a lot like my fourth period class back in high school really.

Anna still hates me. And I still don't know why. Sometimes I kinda wanna try dating someone else but then other times I flake. There's actually this one girl I know irl who's pretty cute but I don't know if she'd be interested in me (and why would she BE-- I suck), I don't even know anything aboot her, I still can't really talk to people, I have no money or transportation with which to go on dates, I don't actually know what one is supposed to DO on dates, all my eccentricities would probably scare her off anyway, et cetera. So nothing'll probably pan oot there. I'll wait for Anna to stop hating me, I guess. Sometimes it's fun to have pipe dreams though. Also I'd like to have a girlfriend by August because of this one thing August is the National Month of that I won't say here because normies might be reading this.

http://last.fm/user/NickBate - In addition to LJ, I also use Last.fm again noo that I got this new laptop. For those unfamiliar, it tracks what music you listen to and coonts what songs/bands you listen to most and stuff. Tip: for me it's mostly They Might Be Giants.

Nick L. Nickel, signing off. Remember kiddies, there's an infinite number of parallel universes, but none of them contain Kentucky.

January 7th, 2012

The following was written during the several months I wasn't able to go to Dad's, so a lot of it's really outdated and compared to more recent happenings, too unimportant to post. But I'd hate to waste a thing it took me that long to write, so here it is anyway.
The following was written during the several months I wasn't able to go to Dad's, so a lot of it's really outdated and compared to more recent happenings, too unimportant to post. But I'd hate to waste a thing it took me that long to write, so here it is anyway.

'Sup gais?! So, last time my stay at Dad's went p well. I knocked the big stuff of my to-do list, which was mainly putting my newest List of Canonical Favourite Recording Artists addition (Joanna Newsom. I know, what with almost every other artist on the list being alt-rock, it doesn't make sense for me to like an indie-folk artist. Yeah well, I don't go by genres, I go by artists. For example, Last.fm is always telling me to listen to stuff that's similar to TMBG but turns out I don't like things similar to TMBG. Just TMBG themselves. I can't even recognize genres anyway. Dunno why. I don't get most of music theory. Keys, octaves, time signatures, rhythm. It's all Greek to me. But I digress.) on my iPod and uploading stuff I made. I also achieved a major win when I got one of Anna N's friends to admit one of the details of The Thing was a lie. Unfortunately, she only came clean aboot that one specific detail and not The Thing as a whole yet. Yet. It'll come oot eventually.
I also helped Dad disassemble a pool a little bit each day. Apparently the purpose of it is to take the aluminum to the recycling place and get paid or something. The whole thing was a real chore. Pretty much 90% of it was taking a drill and getting all the screws out. After that, we just smashed it apart with a sledgehammer. The sledgehammering was actually pretty fun. Due to my larping, I'm pretty decent at swinging motions. Actually, Dad mentioned that I'm pretty strong, but I think it really depends on what I'm doing. Like, even though I have really forceful swings, I'm not great at lifting stuff, or holding boards down while someone else saws/hammers nails in, or anything else that requires strength. Just swinging. Maybe punching too, but I've never really tried punching anything other than the air. All I know is, I keep throwing my back out holding my cats, so I'm preeeetty sure it's just swinging. Plus, I made ki flames, so that amplified my strength and agility higher than the default values. Also I jumped during the up-swings to gain more force, so... kinda cheated a lot.
So back at the not-Internet abode, I started watching a couple new shows mainly due to hype in the news and/or networks I was already watching acquiring rights to air them in syndication. They actually turned oot to be p okay so I continued watching them. Nothing else to do, ya know? Unfortunately, TV-watching is a very hectic hobby to figure out, because A) a lot of things overlap eachother, causing me to have to make choices, and B) most everything's on from 7 PM until 6 AM with few (if any) breaks between shows, so I don't have much time left over to do other stuff. I really dug my own grave this time. I should probably stop trying new things. Also, please note that the shows haven't been added to my List of Obsessions. They're pretty much just regular interests, like normal people have. Unlike things that are Obsessions, it's not a big deal if I miss an airing or two. I don't even really keep up with new episodes either. Well, I kinda do, but if I'm doing something else at the time then I forsake it and continue whatever I'm doing. TV is more of a thing to do when there ain't nothin' else to do. I dunno. It's complicated; I can't really explain. You non-aspies probably understand it anyway. (Can I call myself an aspie without actually being diagnosed? Everyone knows I am one...)

The current season of The Office has got me to thinking aboot some things. The first thing being Dwight's assistant (I forget his name... isn't it something like "Nate"?) keeps saying odd things that apply to me, and I'm wondering if maybe they're more symptoms of autism and/or Asperger's or something. Like, okay, the first time I took notice was during the "Lotto" episode when he said something aboot when there's a lot of noise going on at the same time, he can't hear very well. I took notice of this because, as I said in the Wildwood entry, I have this same problem-- even though my actual ears are fine AFAIK, when there's a lot of different sounds going on at the same time I have trouble making out any specific one. Like, in high school, on the bus rides I talked to the kid who sat behind me, but half the time I couldn't make out what he was saying because there's also the sound of the engine, other kids talking, etc. It wasn't a matter of volume, just... a lot of different sounds going on at once. It also affects my ability to hear all the instruments in music. I can only "zoom in" on one instrument at a time. But anyway yeah, I shrugged it off at first but then that dude said another thing that caught my attention in a later episode. The Christmas one, to be exact. When Val made a joke aboot the people in the office being "popsicles", whats-his-name misinterpreted it to mean that they're so rich they can afford to eat popsicles a lot, when really it means they have metaphorical sticks up their butts. But yeah, I misinterpet a lot of things in the same way. When I hear a new phrase, my brain instantly comes up with a complex explanation/definition that makes perfect sense to me, but then later when I actually look it up it turns out it really means something a lot simpler than what I assumed it meant. I don't know how to explain this. I can't think of any examples right now but it happens to me a lot. Anyway, between that and the hearing thing, I wonder if they're symptoms of something? I do often discover that a lot of my characteristics are Asperger's symptoms when prior to my research I never really gave them any thought. Like, I just kinda accept that they're normal things. But then WHAM, a trip to the Internet reveals it's an Asperger's symptom. Like, really often. Every time I go to Dad's, pretty much.

Another whimsical thing I noticed on The Office is that Robert California seems to be obsessed with Sesame Street. Last season finale he mentioned he learned aboot paper from the show, then on "The List" he randomly talks to Jim aboot Sesame Street again for no apparent reason, and then at Halloween we find out his son's name is Bert. I suppose it's a bit of a stretch (I do tend to jump to wild conclusions when it comes to shows... especially Bonus Stage), but I hope not. I hope it's an actual running gag/part of his character. The mental image of such an intimidating dude like that watching Sesame Street religiously amuses me greatly. Someone should tell Scootle aboot this. He'd probably be amused by it too. He also seemed to like my theory aboot David Wallace being the Scranton Strangler, because he RT'd it. Unless he meant it like how most people RT me when I say something unintentionally hilarious.

I've been on a baking spree lately. First was chocolate chip cookies, then a chocolate chip cake for a costume party (which Joyce finally bought me a fedora for!), and then Nanny found this recipe book she apparently had lying around for years but never noticed before. I made these "mocha drops" from it, which turned out alright. Almost learned how to marble things and also what "folding" means. Also, fudge and then more chocolate chip cookies, and then biscotti, then sugar cookies (Joyce blackmailed me into that one with McDonald's), then "cake in a mug", then brownies, then cake in a mug again, then even more chocolate chip cookies. Most of this stuff was fairly new to me; I usually just make chocolate chip cookies. So naturally mistakes were made. The fudge was completely ruined, as it turns out there's two different kinds of sugar and, not realizing this, I used the wrong kind. I used granulated when it was supposed to be confectioner's. I'm assuming confectioner's sugar has a much more subtle taste than granulated because the result basically tastes like eating a spoonful of straight-up sugar. Which I do sometimes. I also have difficulty marbling, so the mocha drops and biscotti looked weird. I don't think it affected the taste though. P much just aesthetic. I also misinterpreted the directions for the cake and ended up mixing together things that were supposed to be layered. I guess it didn't matter. Everyone liked it. You know what this means, right? I can cook for my wife and kids someday! ^_^ Also, apparently Nanny doesn't know what a mug is. The "cake in a mug", as the name suggests, was this tiny tiny cake you make in a coffee mug. I got out a mug and Nanny started yelling at me, saying that's a cup, not a mug. Then she pulls out this huge bowl that has a handle (and that I use for cans of soup too large to fit in your average bowl) and she said that was a mug. I ignored her stupidity and used the actual mug. When it obviously turned out fine, I rubbed it in her face. Fun day.

I had a terrible day on November first. I went to the mall to get the new TMBG rarities collection, but everything went wrong all at once. Joyce still hadn't given me the rest of the money she owed me for painting her garage a few months back, so I could p much only afford TMBG and one other CD. Or so I thought. We got groceries right before heading to the mall, but Joyce didn't have enough for everything, so she borrowed twelve bucks from me. So now I was down to just TMBG. OR SO I THOUGHT. Upon getting to the mall and searching both the "new releases" section and TMBG's section, it dawned on me that once again, a release date had been pushed back (Shh, I know, I'll get to it later) and I had to find out the hard way due to my lack of Internet access. Join Us all over again... So then I looked around at other recording artists I liked. I found four things that picqued my interest. I mean, there was a lot more than four things I still need, but these ones in particular were prioritized because I assume they won't be there for very long-- the store I go to has a really random selection of displayed items.

While looking at Beatles stuff I saw a bizarre collection I've never heard of before, of stuff they did with Tony Sheridan back before their first album. I was p much like "yeah man, gettin' this" but I figured I'd look around more and see if there was anything else I wanted even more. Then I found out they remastered Nevermind (just like they did with Bleach not long ago!) and rereleased it with a bonus disc of b-sides and stuff. Sadly, I didn't have the money for it. I also noticed there was a Joanna Newsom section, which surprised the crap out of me. They lack a few of my favourite artists, including Jack Off Jill who I'm p sure was fairly famous, so I didn't think they'd have her either. But they did. All they had was Have One on Me, though. Which I couldn't afford either, because, you know, three discs. I should probably get it next time I have money before it goes the way of TheSTART-- they had one of their CDs one time and then never again. Also of much confusion was that she was in the pop/rock aisles. The last thing I stumbled upon was the three-disc version of A Best of Us...for the Rest of Us by Reel Big Fish. Unlike Have One on Me, this was p cheap because it was on sale for some reason. Three discs for eleven bucks? Hells yeah, I thought. I assume it's probably limited edition, too, so yeah. So I got it. But next time I have money I'm gonna try to get those other three. They probably won't have them anymore though. Like I said, they always have a weird selection that changes each time I go there.
I had an interesting dream the one night. The vast majority of my dreams are interesting, especially the ones with my recurring locations/characters/events in them, but yeah. For some reason, there was some sort of gathering at my biological mum's place and in addition to her relatives were Thom, Anna, Jerkemy, and Anna's parents. Apparently my social phobia doesn't exist in the Dream World, because I was being very vocal aboot my hatred of Anna's stupid boyfriend. I was making quite a scene, actually. Probably ruining everyone's good times. Think Michael Scott at literally every party shown on The Office. At one point I just started crying and grabbed Thom for a consolation hug. Oddly enough, he obliged. Even odder though was that he was wearing a tux. Probably because I've been drawing him like that lately. No idea why. But anyway, what I took from the dream was maybe I should just not try and cure my social phobia at all. I mean, if I'll just be a dick anyway, maybe it's best for everyone if I just never talk to anyone. Sidenote, I noticed my condition is kind of like Raj from The Big Bang Theory's. Except, you know, not limited to just females. Maybe I should be drunk all the time too.

Once I got more phone minutes I immediately used ten of them to load up the TMBW page on Album Raises New and Troubling Questions to find out what happened with it. Turns out it was never meant to be released in stores; it's a digital download with a limited supply of CDs available on their website. AAAUGH another digital-only release. >< I hate when they do that, because A) I have very sparse periods of Internet access, B) they always use mp3 format, so there's quality loss, C) I just plain like having physical things, and D) I don't have a bank account or credit cards or anything. Also apparently the CD is only there for a limited time. Well, I guess it's not as bad as Almanac, which never had a physical release at all. Also, The Spine Hits the Road. And the original Venue Songs. And every live show ever. Except for Live!! New York City 10/14/94. But I digress. Luckily Joyce had a couple more painting jobs for me to do and I managed to get paid and ask my b-mum to preorder it for me. It came with a free mp3 download, so I listened to it even before the CD arrived. It's pretty great. I tried listing my favourite tracks from it but it ended up being pretty much all of them. Mixed feelings aboot Havalina being on it. It's a great song and I think TMBG did the original justice p well (I listen to the Pixies, so) and I'm glad it's a lot more accessible now, but... I dunno man, I already had Dig for Fire: A Tribute to Pixies and I was hoping to let Anna listen to the track and she'd be all "OMG THIS IS AWESOME HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THIS", 'cause, like, as thorough as she is when it comes to TMBG, I don't think she collects the various artists compilations like I do. Well, I dunno, hopefully I still have other rare finds to show her, like... I have the 1985 Demo Tape, Wiggle Diskette, all the commercial singles/EPs and a couple inconsistent promotional ones, a few Dial-a-Song demos, bootlegs, etc.... I mean yeah, mp3 format, but she doesn't mind sound quality. Sometimes we're so different... Heh.

Maddi kinda really screwed me over again. Apparently she made another Nick thread on /cwc/ and this time it got me an ED article. So now that I've been brought to pretty much the entire Internet's attention I've had trolls harrassing the crap out of me on Twitter and stuff. Not really sure what to do aboot it. I hate to argue with them, because that's what they want-- to read the stuff I say and lol at my sperginess, but really once you're dox'd you're basically fucked. If you ignore them, they make fun of you. If you talk to them, they make fun of you. It's lose-lose. Jessa claims they got a lawyer to ban me from California, but... come on, man. Come on. A) I would have been notified somehow, B) they're not gonna do that without giving me a trial or whatever to defend myself (epsecially since I haven't even done anything), and C) p sure that'd be outside the powers of a lawyer anyway. I don't know why they keep coming up with all these ridiculous things. Also Jerkemy picked a fight with me for a few days. Turns out he really is a jerk. Like, big-time. Not even just in the argument; he kept responding to all my regular tweets that weren't even aimed at him (like aboot when I messed up baking the fudge and stuff) and kept throwing insults at me like, constantly, for no reason whatsoever. Also apparently he's a troll because he posted the whole thing on /cwc/. I don't know why Anna would date a douche like that. Especially a troll.

So yeah Maddi kinda ruined my pre-life and possibly part of my future actual life too. Why does she keep doing this? Well... not much I can do at the moment but keep working on Anna. Maybe when I turn out to be the only one right out of hundred of thousands, they'll shut the hell up aboot me being crazy and stuff. But anyway, even though it should go withoot saying, I'mma go ahead and say it anyway, in case it isn't: if you read my ED article or hear stuff floating aroond aboot me online, it's not true. I mean, there's some truth in there, but... you know how trolls roll. It's all twisted into insults/slander/libel. Like, obviously the situation with Anna exists, but I'm not a stalker or whatever. And obviously I never molested any children. Et cetera, et cetera. Hey Maddi, can you like, stop posting our DMs on /cwc/ and stuff? You said you regretted posting that first thread, but then, like, you did it again. And then continued to do so. Even more. It's kind of irritating and is screwing me over pretty majorly because as I said, my dumb b-family keeps thinking I did something to initiate trolls calling them and then they yell at me and stuff. I still platonically love you though, *hug*.

So in summation... did things online that most people would find mundane but not me because Asperger's, destroyed a pool, watched TV, apparently I enjoy baking, had a sorta psychic-ish dream, digital downloads upset me greatly, and oh yeah I have trolls on my ass (figuratively speaking). I have the boringest pre-life. When can my actual life start?

AN ATTEMPT TO NOT BE WHINY

'Sup. I had two entries ready for posting, but flaked at the last minute. They were too whiny. I refuse to be perceived as one of those entitled punk kids who think they have the right to mooch off people and get whatever they want without giving anything in return and stuff. I am not one of those punk kids. So rather than going into detail, here's some brief summaries. Or possibly boxer summaries. Or Hanes summaries, which are supposedly neither one nor the other.

September 1st was my 20th birthday. As always, it was a disappointment. I was really counting on getting something I can connect to the Internet with, like a laptop or iPad or netbook or DSi or something. Did not happen. Pretty PO'd. Also ran out of phone minutes two hours before my birthday and still haven't gotten the money for more, so I haven't had contact with anyone for a few weeks, which sucked. Also, someone who isn't in my address book texted me a couple times. Since I'm out of minutes, I can't open it to see who it was or what they wanted. It's driving me crazy. What if someone kidnapped someone and told me to do stuff within a certain time limit or else they kill them? D:

Also, we had the aftershock of an earthquake and two hurricanes. I didn't get any damage but I hear nearby towns were devastated and some people died. I dunno why natural disasters never seem to do anything here, but hey man, I'm cool with it.

I think a ghost may have molested me. I accidentally fell asleep with my unit hanging out one day, and then I dreamt someone was touching my scrotum. And I actually felt hands on it p realistically, which scared me awake. Then I noticed that somehow the blanket had been pulled down past my dingus. So uh, that happened. I sure hope you can't get STDs from ghosts. I mean, I'd assume no because you kinda have to have a body to have diseases, but I dunno. I shouldn't make assumptions. I'll be an ass and an ump will shun me. Ghosts seem to take on the appearance of bodies somehow, so you never know, maybe they can mimic attributes of bodies as well, such as having diseases. Maybe I should get tested just in case.

September 11th was the 10th anniversary of the release of my favourite band They Might Be Giants' eighth album Mink Car. I drew a thing to commemorate it. Also drew a few other things, which is weird because I haven't really been in much of a drawing mood for years.

There was an incident with Joyce yelling at me for no reason. I snapped and went into one of my mouth-foaming unintelligible-screaming spells again, which rarely happens (just like me being a kitten!). I managed to not assault anyone this time though. My biological family are all jerks. I wish I could live with Maddi instead. But I probably can't, on account o' she's a minor. I dunno. I'll ask her.
Plan B is living with Jessa, but she temporarily dislikes me for some reason, so I need to devise a

Plan C.
That's p much it.

cough cough

PART THREE: JOIN US REVIEW

Normally whenever there's a new TMBG album I discuss every track in-depth with A Specific Person, but now that they hate me I have no one to do this with anymore, which sucks. With Here Comes Science it wasn't as big a deal since it was a children's album, but this time it really hurts because it's the first adult album we can't discuss. I mean yeah we can totally do it once we become friends again, but by then they'll have already gotten all of it out of their system with their other friends. So yeah. :/ But I guess I'll do a little bit here of reviewing here, on LJ. In this entry. Right now. Okay, so, Join Us.

My favourite tracks are "Can't Keep Johnny Down", "You Probably Get That a Lot", "Old Pine Box", "Canajoharie", "Cloisonné", "Let Your Hair Hang Down", "The Lady and the Tiger", "2082", and "Three Might Be Duende".

The best part of "Can't Keep Johnny Down", IMO, is the fact that "dick" is used as an adjective. That line makes me laugh every time. Plus it's just a really good song.
I was reading the liners on the ride home from the record store, and upon reading the lyrics to "You Probably Get That a Lot", I had to ask my drivers what in the blazes a "cephalophore" is. Upon looking it up on her phone, Wendy told me it's apparently a Greek mythology thing (typical TMBG, right?). A cephalophore is apparently someone that can live without a head. This amused the crap out of me because Adult Swim just started airing a new anime aboot a cephalaphore. Except she's a dulahan. But it sounds like p much the same thing. But anyway, the song has a p catchy hook. While I'm terrible at distinguishing genres apart, it seems to be a pop song similar to "Ana Ng". Idk, I could be wrong, so don't quote me on that.

"Old Pine Box" is pretty good too. I don't really know what else to say aboot it. I just like it, okay?
The video of "Canajoharie" played live already had me hooked on the song, and to my shock the finished version was even better! Like "Can't Keep Johnny Down", it's a really infectious rock song. I especially enjoy the bridge, which A) has a bassline that refuses to get out of my head, and B) seems to have backwards accordion.

"Cloisonné" stands out from the previous four tracks in that rather than being pop/rock, it's more old-school TMBG that I can't really figure out how to label with a genre. Reminds me of "Stalk of Wheat" or something though, idk. I'm always a sucker for brass sections, and this song indeed has one.

"Let Your Hair Hang Down" is another 60's/70's/80's-style pop song similar to "Twisting" or "Bangs". And by that I don't mean the lyrics. But now that I think of it, yes, the lyrics are similar to "Bangs" too. I mean, they're both aboot hair. That should be kinda obvious.

"Celebration" mentions Anonymous. I wonder how they're going to react to that? Also it's like their most mainstream-sounding song ever.

I can guarantee you that Certain People I Could Name are going to post that "When Will You Die" makes them think of me. While that depresses me, I'm not letting it ruin the song for me. Not one of my favourites from the album, but still a solid song.

To exact Prevenge for "When Will You Die", I am reminded of That Person by "Never Knew Love". Because they p clearly have never known love. But um, let's not get into that again. I wasn't all that thrilled with this particular song; it doesn't really stand out. It's not bad though.
"The Lady and the Tiger" is TMBG attempting and succeeding at rap. When the tracklisting was first revealed I was crossing my fingers and hoping that this track was a re-titling of "No Answer". Sadly, it was not. But it's still a great song in its own right.

"2082" and "Three Might Be Duende" are both p much more old-school TMBG. The latter is probably my favourite track from Join Us. Also of note is that a duende is basically a specific type of goblin in Mexican mythology. I was not aware Mexico had mythology before. Well, except for El Chupacabra. Turns out they do. I wonder if it's really a march like the lyrics claim?

As a whole, Join Us seems to be mostly straghtforward alt-rock. It also seems to have a lot of added studio effects, much like Flood and Mink Car. Also Join Us seems to have a lot of "Beatles stereo" like they did with "(She Thinks She's) Edith Head" and "Robot PArade (Adult Version)". While I'd prefer they stick to simple, raw sounds, they're still TMBG and they can do whatever and it'll still be amazing. I'm also glad to witness the return of the accordion after their last adult album, The Else, lacked it completely. Keep up the good work, They!

PS - This may just be my CD (I hope not considering it's brand new), but I keep hearing a lot of clicks/pops. I actually investigated one of them. At like 1:16 in "You Probably Get That a Lot" there's one, so I tried ripping it again. And it was still there. So I dunno. I also think I heard some on "Canajoharie" and "Three Might Be Duende". Maybe more. Idk, hopefully it's in the actual songs.

PART TWO: MORE EMO WHINING

In this entry, I'm gonna be doing a lot of whining. Don't worry, it's not aboot Anna for once. It's something else. The *chan thing. LJ Cut time!

The situation with the channers is starting to get to me. I'm p much over all my accounts being hijacked, so now I'm focused on the other thing. You know, the stuff they keep posting aboot me. Psychoanalyzing me and whatnot. I seriously hate when people do that. My biological mom's been doing it my whole life, telling people I do weird things to get attention. It's the most annoying thing. It's completely untrue, and in fact, is the polar opposite of the truth. I don't know why people keep ignoring the fact that I really hate being around other people... I literally just want to live alone in some secluded wilderness with my wife and kids, far away from any other people. Except if/when our friends visit or whatever. That'd be fine. It'd be cool to hang out with Jessa and Maddi irl. Y'know, if Jessa ever likes me again. Other than my immediate non-biological family and friends I would really rather nobody knows I even exist (which I guess is ruined now). Also, I don't even understand people who do do weird stuff for attention. I mean, yes, it's really sad that society sucks and hates everything, but shouldn't they be doing something that is accepted by society instead? Like, if someone wanted attention, couldn't they just become an actor or start a band or something? Idk. I just do weird stuff because I actually like the stuff. It's who I am. I suppose it would probably be smart to not tell people aboot my quirks, but meh. I don't like lying or hiding things. It feels really wrong and my friends wouldn't even really be my friends-- they'd be friends with a lie. :/

But anyway yeah, the thing that really bothers me is how they word stuff. Normally I wouldn't even pay any mind to untrue rumours (and even less to things that are actually true), but the way they never use "weasel words" really strikes a nerve. It makes it sound as if the stuff has been confirmed somehow, like I admitted to it or something, so people who don't know the whole story read the stuff and assume it's true. Even when they say, like, "he did this stuff, but denies it", that still doesn't help anything because then it sounds like I'm in denial or something. (Btw, they actually do say I'm in denial too, so that sucks.) If it were a few people saying things aboot me, I wouldn't care so much considering I already have all of you-know-who's friends doing it, but dayumn. I don't know how many people are on that imageboard, but I assume anywhere from hundreds to hundreds of thousands. So like, a tenth of the world hates me or whatever the fraction would be. I dunno, I suck at math. Let's see... what are some of the other things they keep saying? Um, well okay, I saw that this one guy had a theory on why I don't want The Thing to happen. Again, no weasel words were used. He said something along the lines of I'm being selfish and just want A Thing to myself. And some other guy for some reason thought I treat women like objects. That's... I can't even... Dude, everyone who knows me knows I'm p much the least bigoted person ever! >_<

And I guess someone referred to my catchphrase "Kentucky Don't Exist!" as a forced meme. Not exactly an insult, but still. Not a meme, yo. It was never intended to catch on. It's just my thing. And some idiot was all "lololol he doesn't know what words mean" in response to my FF7 video. No, you fool; I meant I was working on a perfect game but haven't completed it yet. It's incomplete. And, um, a couple people were saying I used something called "circular logic" in trying to defend myself, and I guess using circular logic makes your argument automatically invalid somehow? I dunno, it sounds stupid. No matter how I try to defend myself they pull out some science word explaining why everything I say is wrong. Also, "Everything Right Is Wrong Again". So then I just gave up. Hopefully everyone just stops caring by themselves and leaves me alone. But probably not. Because they're dicks. In a dick town. Okay, Nick, that's enough TMBG references for today.

I don't even get why they're doing this. What's the point in picking on someone who's different? What on earth do you gain from it? They would've actually gained more by not changing my passwords, because then I could continue posting things and they could lol aboot how stupid I am or whatever. Plus, everyone is different in some way. Why are some characteristics privvy to ridicule but not others? What are the exact mechanics that determine which traits people persecute others for possessing? The whole thing seems stupid to me. Speaking of stupid things, I also read that some people were lolling aboot how I think people would actually care aboot the mundane things I post on Twitter and whatnot. ...Um. Are you, like, completely new to Twitter or something? The whole point of the site is to post mundane shit nobody would get enjoyment out of. You don't post the stuff to entertain other people, you just do it because it's fun. I'm well aware nobody likes my tweets. I'm not tweeting for them, geez. Also, sometimes I write myself notes so I don't forget stuff. I dunno, literally absolutely nothing they say makes any sense whatsoever. Sometimes I wonder if they actually believe the dumb things they're saying or if they're just screwing with me.

Also, irritated by people making fun of my art. The Coffee Crew is a cartoon - it's intetionally drawn in a cartoony style. You're supposed to be focusing on the writing, not the art. That's why you never hear people bitch aboot the art on other cartoons, like South Park or Family Guy or Bonus Stage or whatever. Although yeah, the writing I've posted sucks too. I've been working on it though. The last comics I posted were from, like, 2007 or something, weren't they? I've gotten better at both the art and writing since then, but still have this complex that a script has to be perfect before I make it into a cartoon. I've got good storylines and good jokes, but I'm havin' trouble finding a good balance of the two. Seems like I can only do one or the other. It's tough getting humour to come up organically in the storylines, and if I focus on just humour then there's no plot. And I want plot. And that's why there's still been zero episodes after six years (well it's between that, my lack of equipment, not having reliable Internet access, and my voice actors hating me)! I wish I could describe what I intend for The Coffee Crew to to be like, but I dunno how to. Some dude theorized that I'm trying to be like Jhonen Vasquez. I don't know who that is so I can neither confirm nor deny. I assume it was meant as an insult though. But anyway, enough emo shit.

Finally, there's one last topic I wanted to discuss. You know that disease I've had since 2006 but haven't figured out what it is? Well, a new thing happened with it that maybe someone can make sense of and diagnose me. So, one recent morning I decided to sleep in the opposite direction, with my head nearer to the air conditioner, which was turned on. I slept for maybe two hours and then woke up for no reason, and suddenly my nose was clear (it's constantly stuffy), the roof of my mouth was really cold, and-- not to be gross, but it's kinda unavoidable when discussing my ailments-- my mouth was filled up with some sort of goo, presumably either snot, stomach acid, semen or spinal fluid because I hovered over the sink and opened my mouth, and it was kinda whitish and thick and dripped out really slowly. My mouth is constantly filled with goo, but this time it was a lot more than usual. However, not as much as years ago when I used to have attacks after eating certain foods. Then, after spitting it all out I turned the air conditioner off and laid back down the other way, and the random burning in my chest/upper-abdomen happened. Sometimes I think maybe the chest/upper-abdomen thing is unrelated to the mouth-goo, but occasionally they seem to overlap. But then again, I dunno, they're in two completely different body parts. Also, dunno if either one is related to the cough or not. Sometimes it seems like the burning happens first, then I have the coughing fit, and then my mouth fills up, but not always. Also, my esophagus used to make weird noises occasionally. It might just be a red herring, though, as it stopped when I accidentally graduated from high school (quite literally right afterwards, which is suspicious), and one of my friends (whom shall remain nameless due to a recent incident in which they got mad at me for telling someone something aboot them that I didn't realize was a secret (kinda seems like maybe they should've told me it was a secret when they told it to me, but whatev)) who has/had it too never mentioned having any other symptoms in common with me. So I dunno. Someone, figure out what in the fudge is wrong with me so I can take the correct medication. Back when I was still insured and consequentially able to see a doctor, he misdiagnosed me three times until I was like "okay, not even bothering anymore". And that's the end of today's LJ entry.

With platonic love (except to jerks),

Dr. Nickalaus "Nick" B.S.L.B.N., Ph.D.
Attending Physician
Nick's Proctology Hospital

PS - I'm not making fun of Canadians. This is literally how I talk, even irl. Canadians don't even really say "aboot" or "eh". It's just a stereotype. Well I mean, I'm sure some do say that stuff (considering there's 60 billion people on Earth, none of whom are exactly the same), but for that matter so do people from other countries, so yeah. Not an exclusive Canadian thing. Again, I'm the least bigoted person ever. (Also, swing that judgmental pendulum back the other way-- don't you think it's kinda odd that as soon as you see me saying "aboot" you thought of Canadians? ;D)

PS2 - Hi, channers. I just responded to every one of your posts. Would you kindly sit and spin now? Go on, git. Take your ridiculously incorrect armchair psychology elsewhere. St. Elsewhere.

PSP - No, I'm not really a doctor. It's a thing that I do. God! Stop forcing me to explain things! It ruins it!

PS3 - I would never lie aboot someone behind their back. Not only is it just plain wrong and would make me and my conspirators terrible people, but also the innocent strangers who read the post and thus weren't informed that it was a lie would think it's the truth, so now I'm lying to a bunch more people. And what if the person I was lying aboot found out somehow? Say, if the person I lied to, whom I don't realize knows the lie-victim's name, looked up all their dox and gave them a call? Because as well as I'd think we covered all the angles to support the illusion, they'd still know it's a lie. Bet they'd be p angry when they find out, probably never speak to me again. Maybe take mutual friends with them, too. They'd be especially enraged if I did it just to piss someone off. Techically I could do a thing that would make the lie not a lie anymore, but that would be incredibly stupid. The stupidest thing ever, in fact. Plus they could still be told that the lie occurred before it became a not-lie. And they would be provided with proof of the date. Maybe the only way to not be snitched on is to never make the lie true. Ever. And I'd have to not do anything in the whole arena of the lie, not just the specific thing I lied aboot. And I couldn't just say I won't do the thing(s). They'd have their ways of knowing if I'm really sticking to my promise or not. There'd be many layers to their awareness of my actions. Even though I'd take actions to "BLOCK" the first, most obvious layer, and even the previously-hidden-but-suspicious second layer may have been revealed, there'd still be many more layers I'm not aware of and will never be aware of. Yeah.

UGH.

I've been trying to keep Anna things off of my LJ but I no longer have access to the place I was channeling it all into because of the jerk channers taking over most of my accounts, so I kinda have to put it here. Sorry. If you're one of the people trying to stay out of it, just ignore this post.

 EDIT: UGH WHY IS LJ CUT NOT WORKING

The Anna Quest is going horribly at the moment. A few weeks ago, one of my friends decided to post a thread aboot me on an imageboard for some reason. A bunch of douchebag chantards hate me now and hacked most of my accounts and called my mom telling her I molested my half-sister (which I didn't, of course), but this isn't aboot all that. Apparently the thread attracted the attention of Anna and Jessa somehow, and for whatever reason they posted in it that Anna had sex with her jerk boyfriend Jeremy (whom I like to call Jerkemy). I have oodles of evidence that they're most likely lying just to upset me, but nothing concrete.

Their plan is sure as hell working. I don't know exactly why the thought of her having sex with someone upsets me so much (although I do know a lot of other bad repercussions), but it does. A lot. Anna having sex is constantly on my mind, traumatizing me. Literally, constantly. I can't even distract myself with video games or TV or music or whatever as I usually do when shit upsets me. "In Fact" (by They Might Be Giants), it kinda adds on to it. Every time I try to listen to TMBG now, it reminds me of how obsessive and energetic and nerdy Anna is. She's like a sweet, innocent little girl. And I love that aboot her. But if it's true that she's had sex, then, well, she's not innocent anymore.
Also, I keep uncontrollably having mental videos of all the horrible repercussions Anna having sex would have. For one, I'd continue to be all depressed like this forever, and I could never be happy and I'd never get any enjoyment out of anything anymore. And I imagine it'd be a huge buzzkill for Anna to be married to someone who couldn't enjoy their marriage. Plus, sex is supposed to be a really special thing shared by soul mates... if she has sex with someone else, well, yeah, it ruins sex for us when we finally do end up together. I've always wanted to make her first time especially special and romantic. I'll kiss her and caress her while we make passionate love, and maybe even throw around some rose petals and light candles, if I can ever figure out where you get those things from. I dunno if she's into mood music or not but I'll do that too if she is. Personally it creeps me out to do anything sexual when music's playing because it feels like the singer's watching me. Hell, I even take off my t-shirts and throw them somewhere face-down when I jack off. But whatev, it's all aboot what Anna wants. I bet stupid Jerkemy just wants to put his penis in and jackhammer and have horrible porn sex. :/

What follows now is all the evidence why I suspect they're lying. Enjoy.

When Maddi first read me the post, I already had my doubts that it was true. She then asked Jessa, who "confirmed" by saying Anna told her she had sex a few days after it happened. Right there's a red flag. A few days? Dude, this is Anna we're talking aboot. She would've told everyone immediately, especially her best friend. Why on earth would she wait that long unless her computer was fucked up or something?

I exchanged posts with Jessa in the thread for a while. When I told her I didn't believe it, she then pulled another story out of her presumably hot ass, saying she and Myrrh licked eachother's boobs and engaged in heavy petting. Problem is, I was still Anna's friend when she met Myrrh irl. She told me all aboot it but never mentioned any of that. All they did was make out and look at each other's boobs. Look, not touch. I even told Jessa this, but she tried to cover by saying Anna was trying to avoid hurting my feelings. Um, no she wasn't... If she wanted to avoid hurting my feelings, she wouldn't have even told me what she did tell me. The making out hurt quite a lot for quite a while, and she knew it would. I mean, yeah, it didn't hurt as much as Anna doing anything sexual would, but at that point I hadn't yet told her my thoughts on her doing anything sexual. She would've assumed sex would be the same amount of hurt that making out would be.

Also, Anna's really shy and socially awkward. I doubt she'd be able to get nekkid in front of a dude let alone have sex. Even if she did, she wouldn't know what to do. She'd most likely just lay there motionless. I mean, she'll most likely pick up on the kissing once I start, but it'll probably take her longer to figure out what to do with her hands. Hell, she doesn't know what to do with them when she's sleeping, even. Neither do I, actually. But I digress.

She was with her last boyfriend, Paul, way longer than she's been with Jeremy and nothing happened between them either. Apparently Paul didn't even like kissing. Let's hope Jeremy shares the sentiment as well.

I recently heard Anna's in college now (which also upsets me, but that's a discussion for another day), so how would she even find the time and place to have sex? She lives in a dorm, presumably with a roommate, on a college campus.

I also highly doubt that Anna and Jeremy's relationship is even all that serious. As far as I can tell, they went to prom (as friends), and sometimes hang out. Pretty much just the same shit she did with Paul. Which is basically just friend things. It's painfully obvious to me that Anna doesn't even understand love. She's mistaking intense crushes for love, and that can be extremely dangerous. I mean yeah, seems like everyone goes through that phase at some point. I know I did, up until I met Anna and fell in love for real. Once it clicked for me, I started noticing other people being really stupid with relationships too, mainly in high school and on the Internet. People toss the word "love" around way too casually, when they don't really mean it. Anna's been doing just that her whole life. She "loved" Myrrh, Paul, and apparently Jeremy now, but if she actually took the time to compare the former two to Jeremy, she'd realize nothing's any different from her first two "loves". It's sad, really. Anna's so big on shipping yet doesn't know what love's all aboot.

As far as I can tell, Anna hasn't posted aboot having sex on deviantART, LiveJournal, or anywhere else but in the thread. I did hear that Scott and Jessa posted on Facebook aboot it, but Anna's parents have Facebook accounts and I'd assume they have Anna friended, so they would've seen it. Unless Anna told them aboot the plan or something, idk. My assumption is that she and her friends took advantage of the Nick thread, which they knew I would read at some point, and posted a lie aboot having sex in it to either upset me or make me stop loving her. Or both. But the joke's on them, 'cause even if it were true that still wouldn't make me stop loving her. It would ruin her lives, but not make me stop loving her.

Hopefully nobody but me would even want to have sex with her, because I heard third- or maybe fourth-hand that she has BO. I dunno who it came from, but my guess is Jessa since she's the only one who's met Anna irl who would be talking to my friends. Everyone lost contact with Myrrh once Anna decided to hate her, and I don't think anyone talks to Sean or Kate either. Except maybe Scott. I guess it's possible one of them told Scott, who told another person, who told me. Idk. I'm still thinking Jessa. Jessa's p nice though, so if it was her I'm sure she didn't mean it as an insult, just as a fact. Seems like something that'd be true. She seems to have not-great hygience. It would also explain the photo of her holding deodorant. Although I find it odd that she changed brands. She used to use Teen Spirit (strawberry scented, to be exact) because of the Nirvana song.
Touching back on the shyness thing, how would the subject of sex even come up? I mean, can you imagine it? It'd be awkward as fuck.

And finally, I once saw one of Anna's friends talking to her on Twitter and I suspect they were talking aboot telling me she had sex to get me to kill myself. The exact words were something along the lines of "Yeah, and then right before he dies, say 'Oh yeah, I lied'." Yes, it's p vague, but they were definitely discussing telling someone a lie that would somehow cause their death. Seems to fit.
Looking back one all the evidence makes me feel a little better, but as I said before none of it's concrete. In any case, I hope the truth comes out soon. I also hope that the truth is that she lied. Because if not her lives are irreversibly ruined forever. I would hope she'd have more sense than to do that to herself. I guess we'll find oot...

literally go buy all these

WRITER'S BLOCK: MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE

November 18th, 2009

WRITER'S BLOCK: MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE

mausengeist

Message in a bottle

What three items would you place in a time capsule to help future generations understand you?

Reply 386

Most importantly would be my collection of Anna memorabilia (two binders, a series of CD-Rs, and aflash drive of photos, recordings, letters, videos, etc. I've collected of her). So that's one.

Next I'd probably gather up a bunch of my writings about They Might Be Giants, Bonus Stage, and all my other obsessions. See, I gain a new obsession every few weeks and for the duration of it, I'll just randomly write all kinds of stuff aboot it for no real reason and never, like, re-read over it or anything.

Finally, my hypothetical journal which will explain the purpose of the previous items and probably other stuff, too. P.S. the purpose of the previous items is to showcase my love, dedication, thoroughness and, um... nerdiness? I guess?

Tags: writer's block

STUFF I WANT (FOR CHRISTMAS, OR JUST WHENEVER!)

(I tried using an LJ cut, but something went screwy with the thing. Sorry.)

Here are the things I currently need.

TMBG
my TMBG collection is pretty respectable, but I'm on a quest to obtain every different version of every song released in any format (but I'm focusing on CD for now). As such, there's still a lot of things I need, mostly rare EPs that only really feature one new track.

These include Sleeping in the Flowers, 2001 Radio Sampler No. 1, 2001 Radio Sampler No. 2, S-E-X-X-Y, The Guitar, What We Did This Summer, I Palindrome I, The Leonard Lopate Show Single, etc.

Then there's a couple audiobooks that, if I had them, would contribute LOADS of new tracks. These would be The Partly Cloudy Patriot and They Might Be. Giants vs. McSweeney's.

Also, I need John Linnell's and Mono Puff's albums. I have absolutely zero of their releases.

There are also plenty of various artist compilations that TMBG contributed to. I don't even know them all, but a few include A Tribute to George Harrison, Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers OST, Selections from Rubaiyat, Coraline Soundtrack, etc.

Yes, I'm so obsessed with TMBG that I'll buy a CD just for one of their songs.

The Beatles
I already sent my aunt to fetch me the rest of the new Beatles remasters that I don't already have, so I'll probably get some of those for Christmas. I'd also like Love, though. Some of those mashups are pretty good.

Other bands
For those paying attention to my canonical twelve favourite bands, there's nine more to discuss. I think my Green Day collection is good as is. I don't really listen to them much and they just BARELY qualify as one of my fave bands. "Weird Al", on the other hand, is a collection needing improvement. I only have one release by him, "The Food Album", which isn't even an actual album.

I also need anything by the newest additions Jack Off Jill and Scarling., and also all three of theSTART's albums. I do have their Death Via Satellite EP, but that's only six tracks. When I put all my stuff on shuffle I hardly ever find theSTART.

For the Pixies, I still need Surfer Rosa and Trompe le Monde, and anything containing tracks not found on their actual albums. As far as I know Come On Pilgrim, Pixies at the BBC, and Pixies are the only ones. I could be wrong, though. I have all three Nirvana albums, but again, I need non-album tracks, so... MTV Unplugged, Singles... possibly more, I dunno. I really like the song "Spank Thru" but the only good version of it is on Outcesticide IV, a bootleg.

The last band is Dethklok. And since they only have two releases, um... not a problem. They're low on my priority list, though.

Not music
Other things I need other than music include an external hard drive (1tb+ of storage plz), a USB scanner (apparently Thom's getting me one, woo!), a video recorder (Nanny might be getting me one), an accordion, a top hat, a fedora, platform shoes, aaaand I forget what else was on my list.

DVDs would also be a nice change. The only DVDs I own are 5 of the 6 Rozen Maiden volumes and the first three Sbemail DVDs. I'd like more DVDs of TV shows and stuff, like Family Guy, South Park, King of the Hill, etc. The remaining Rozen Maiden DVD is included in that request. T_T

music: They Might Be Giants - The Bells Are Ringing | Powered by Last.fm

Much in the vein of the ill-fated "listen to a different band every day" challenge, I decided to count up to my one hundredth cup of coffee.

Why? I'm not sure. It's pretty pointless, really... I'm only counting cups I've drank since beginning the challenge, and nothing before. Plus I have very little actual access to coffee, so it's probably gonna be spread over a few months, so it's not like I'm drinking all one hundred in a day or anything. I pretty much just got the idea from Futurama.

In other news, I'm still psyched for both Here Comes Science and the remastered Beatles stuff. Plus Thom made me an audiophile, so now I want headphones and an amp and stuff too. So... September first. My birthday. We'll see what happens.

I'm also writing another Coffee Crew script, but I never finish... so I don't know. We'll see what happens with that, too.

NEW CARTOON IN PROGRESS...

music: They Might Be Giants - Employee of the Month | Powered by Last.fm

It's an old-timey type deal, with no speech but plenty of BGM. Also, it's black-and-white!

Terrible idea? You bet it is!

CONCERT'D! (PLUS, BONUS TALES!)

Ugh, lack of Internet makes me sad. Anyway...

I went to that concert. It was good, until I had to leave. My aunt had work that night, so we only got, like, halfway through the setlist. I'll post a review on TMBW eventually.

Also, my CDs and stuff came. Same day as the concert, too. Gotta love the timing there.

Other than that, this has been a pretty shitty few weeks. I tried once again to drop out of school so I can get that out of the way and focus on, well, you know. "Rya". But people CONTINUE to not let me, so I opted to just stop going to school. Which also didn't work because my fucking aunt kept taking me in. At least school's a bit easier now that I'm out of the mainstream class and back into special ed all day. Also, the social worker in there is trying to hook me up with another psychiatrist. Plus, I had to write an essay about "Rya". I don't think I did as well as I could have.

Speaking of "Rya", I'm still trying to figure out how to get her back. It's hard to do so when I have no way of communicating with her. I'm getting a cell phone soon, but somehow I don't think she'd appreciate being called by someone she hates. So no. I'm kind of running out of ideas. =/